I am SO over all the stupid, new reality shows that are coming out. Television producers must be smoking some major crack these days. Celebrity Circus, Wipe Out, I Survived a Japanese Game Show. You have GOT to be kidding me. I will not watch any of these shows. I seriously cannot believe that new reality shows continue to be rolled out. I thought that it would be a phase, but apparently the American people are not yet tired of all the lame, unintellectual bullshit. Just one more thing to dumb the people down and keep them in front of the television. I wish it would all just go away.
J
Monday, June 23, 2008
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Depressed
Last night I found the blog of Matt Logelin (www.mattlogelin.com) who lives in LA. His gorgeous wife, Liz, passed away in March, just 27 hours after giving birth to their little girl, Madeline, who was 7 weeks pre-mature and weighed 3 lbs 14 oz. He writes each night about what he and his daughter did that day. It's so sweet and beautiful, but at the same time horribly, horribly sad and painful. His posts made me cry multiple times last night and today. I couldn't access the site at work, so I read it after work. I've read all his entries up to today. And after I finished reading, I almost felt sick like throwing up. I was so sad and I feel like I know his wife now and I'm so so so terribly sad for him. There's that saying - "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." I don't know if that's true. I've never loved (romantically, that is), and I feel like I'd rather keep it that way than fall in love and lose him. It's so oppressively devastating!
So I was at home, sad, but I had told my cousin Marcy I'd come over to her place tonight as she was having a "going away" BBQ of sorts. On Sunday she's leaving for Africa for the summer. I really did not feel like going. I took a nap for probably an hour and then headed over an hour after it started... fashionably late. Being there didn't cheer me up at all. I didn't know anyone else. Then a bunch of girls went into Marcy's room to do a Buddhist chant while a lady, who appeared to be a leader, rolled up the scroll they were chanting to (?). I was very uncomfortable because I'm Christian, I didn't know what they were saying, and I was sad that Marcy seemed to have fallen away from God and chosen to pursue Buddhism. It became overwhelming as they got louder and faster, and then once the scroll was rolled up, put into a box, and then placed in a cabinet the chanting slowed down before ceasing.
Marcy's Mom was there and she told me that Marcy recommended she try attending Buddhist meetings and get into chanting because she'd been having some relationship difficulties. She told me that she did try it, and everything is so much better for her now. I just kept nodding and listening. She said, "I thought at first this would be yet another of Marcy's crazy adventures... Like when she went to Ghana and became a born again Christian. Thankfully she got over that and is into this now. This is much healthier." I was so taken aback by that statement. Had she no idea of my faith and that it was such an integral part of my being, and has been for 26 years?! Her words brought me to my breaking point, and I started to cry. I told Marcy that I had to leave.
I hope that tomorrow is a better day.
Peace and love.
J
So I was at home, sad, but I had told my cousin Marcy I'd come over to her place tonight as she was having a "going away" BBQ of sorts. On Sunday she's leaving for Africa for the summer. I really did not feel like going. I took a nap for probably an hour and then headed over an hour after it started... fashionably late. Being there didn't cheer me up at all. I didn't know anyone else. Then a bunch of girls went into Marcy's room to do a Buddhist chant while a lady, who appeared to be a leader, rolled up the scroll they were chanting to (?). I was very uncomfortable because I'm Christian, I didn't know what they were saying, and I was sad that Marcy seemed to have fallen away from God and chosen to pursue Buddhism. It became overwhelming as they got louder and faster, and then once the scroll was rolled up, put into a box, and then placed in a cabinet the chanting slowed down before ceasing.
Marcy's Mom was there and she told me that Marcy recommended she try attending Buddhist meetings and get into chanting because she'd been having some relationship difficulties. She told me that she did try it, and everything is so much better for her now. I just kept nodding and listening. She said, "I thought at first this would be yet another of Marcy's crazy adventures... Like when she went to Ghana and became a born again Christian. Thankfully she got over that and is into this now. This is much healthier." I was so taken aback by that statement. Had she no idea of my faith and that it was such an integral part of my being, and has been for 26 years?! Her words brought me to my breaking point, and I started to cry. I told Marcy that I had to leave.
I hope that tomorrow is a better day.
Peace and love.
J
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Things my Dad taught me
I got this idea from Stephanie Klein's blog.
Things I learned from my father:
1. I don’t need to learn to change my own oil because I’ll make enough money to pay someone else to do it.
2. Even he got Cs in school.
3. Boys have no social graces.
4. The monsters come out at night.
5. It’s ok to cry.
6. Not to call names.
7. How to drive a tractor.
8. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t like to do.
9. How to drive a manual transmission.
10. To make sure the horizon line is completely horizontal when taking a photograph.
11. Capillary action.
12. To enjoy smooth jazz.
13. To shred credit card applications before trashing them.
14. To read a map.
15. To use a computer.
16. That I can’t live without an Apple computer.
17. Reasons the refrigerator might not be working.
18. Economics (even though I still don’t really get it).
19. What it means to be a Democrat or a Republican.
20. x times x equals x squared.
21. What quality stereo sounds like.
22. To use a level, a voltmeter, and an electric drill, among other things.
23. How to pick up dog poop.
24. How to balance a checkbook.
25. To pump gas.
26. To pack by rolling things.
27. To love hockey.
28. How to ride a bike.
29. To get up and walk around when on a long flight.
30. How to fish.
31. How to get something out of the sink drain pipe.
32. To appreciate the fantastic-ness of Home Depot.
33. How to paint a wall.
34. How to pitch a tent, light a lantern, and light a stove.
35. How to pack to go camping.
36. To dig a trench around the tent if it’s going to rain.
37. Cats are awesome.
38. That I can do anything I put my mind to.
39. That education is important.
40. Not to “burn bridges” because you never know who you may have to work for in the future.
41. “There is a certain amount of money that causes all loyalty to go out the window.”
42. Don’t walk through oil spots in parking spaces
43. Avoid pot holes.
44. Unconditional love.
Things I learned from my father:
1. I don’t need to learn to change my own oil because I’ll make enough money to pay someone else to do it.
2. Even he got Cs in school.
3. Boys have no social graces.
4. The monsters come out at night.
5. It’s ok to cry.
6. Not to call names.
7. How to drive a tractor.
8. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t like to do.
9. How to drive a manual transmission.
10. To make sure the horizon line is completely horizontal when taking a photograph.
11. Capillary action.
12. To enjoy smooth jazz.
13. To shred credit card applications before trashing them.
14. To read a map.
15. To use a computer.
16. That I can’t live without an Apple computer.
17. Reasons the refrigerator might not be working.
18. Economics (even though I still don’t really get it).
19. What it means to be a Democrat or a Republican.
20. x times x equals x squared.
21. What quality stereo sounds like.
22. To use a level, a voltmeter, and an electric drill, among other things.
23. How to pick up dog poop.
24. How to balance a checkbook.
25. To pump gas.
26. To pack by rolling things.
27. To love hockey.
28. How to ride a bike.
29. To get up and walk around when on a long flight.
30. How to fish.
31. How to get something out of the sink drain pipe.
32. To appreciate the fantastic-ness of Home Depot.
33. How to paint a wall.
34. How to pitch a tent, light a lantern, and light a stove.
35. How to pack to go camping.
36. To dig a trench around the tent if it’s going to rain.
37. Cats are awesome.
38. That I can do anything I put my mind to.
39. That education is important.
40. Not to “burn bridges” because you never know who you may have to work for in the future.
41. “There is a certain amount of money that causes all loyalty to go out the window.”
42. Don’t walk through oil spots in parking spaces
43. Avoid pot holes.
44. Unconditional love.
Thursday, May 08, 2008
Becoming a Possibilitarian
Didn't have much to do at work today, so I busied myself looking at beautiful things on etsy and exploring artists' websites. One of my favorite mixed media artists on etsy is Kelly Rae Roberts. She is so creative and talented. Her work is gorgeous.
From Kelly Rae Roberts’ website:
i first heard the word ‘possibilitarian’ in a quote by dr. norman peale: “become a possibilitarian. no matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities – always see them, for they’re always there.” i’ve been hooked on its meaning ever since. do you see the bright light of your life’s horizon (even on the average days)? do you feel its warmth (even when you’re struggling)? have you begun to tough the surface of all that is possible for your life? does it give you goosebumps to think about it (i hope it does)? if so, then you’re a possibilitarian too. it’s the best feeling in the world, this thinking of what is possible. it’s energy. it’s passion. it’s dreaming big, and taking small steps. it’s the oomph of our everyday lives.
I know that I was meant for more than being just an accountant. Yesterday at work I was surfing etsy as I’m wont to do and I came upon a shop of a lady who had committed to donating some of her profits to Doctors Without Borders in the wake of the horrific results of the cyclone in Myanmar. I’d heard of Doctors Without Borders before, but I had never looked into it until this week. Not only are they looking for volunteers in the medical field, they are looking for people with office-type skills to manage their operations. One of the opportunities that jumped out at me is the Financial Controllership job. I could totally do this! Now since it’s a volunteer position, I certainly cannot afford, at this point in my life, to take a year off of being paid to do this. But, I have a meaningful goal to look forward to.
If you are interested in learning about Doctors Without Borders or in making a donation, please visit their website at www.doctorswithoutborders.org.
Peace & love.
J
From Kelly Rae Roberts’ website:
i first heard the word ‘possibilitarian’ in a quote by dr. norman peale: “become a possibilitarian. no matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities – always see them, for they’re always there.” i’ve been hooked on its meaning ever since. do you see the bright light of your life’s horizon (even on the average days)? do you feel its warmth (even when you’re struggling)? have you begun to tough the surface of all that is possible for your life? does it give you goosebumps to think about it (i hope it does)? if so, then you’re a possibilitarian too. it’s the best feeling in the world, this thinking of what is possible. it’s energy. it’s passion. it’s dreaming big, and taking small steps. it’s the oomph of our everyday lives.
I know that I was meant for more than being just an accountant. Yesterday at work I was surfing etsy as I’m wont to do and I came upon a shop of a lady who had committed to donating some of her profits to Doctors Without Borders in the wake of the horrific results of the cyclone in Myanmar. I’d heard of Doctors Without Borders before, but I had never looked into it until this week. Not only are they looking for volunteers in the medical field, they are looking for people with office-type skills to manage their operations. One of the opportunities that jumped out at me is the Financial Controllership job. I could totally do this! Now since it’s a volunteer position, I certainly cannot afford, at this point in my life, to take a year off of being paid to do this. But, I have a meaningful goal to look forward to.
If you are interested in learning about Doctors Without Borders or in making a donation, please visit their website at www.doctorswithoutborders.org.
Peace & love.
J
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Listen to your body
A few weeks ago my neck went out again. I was out of commission for two and a half days; just lying in bed or on the couch. I was pretty angry about it. I thought that this year's busy season would be more tolerable and less stressful because I only had one client this year whereas last year I had 4-5. Unfortunately I was wrong. In exploring the situation, I discovered that I don't really express anger when I feel or experience it. I store it all in my neck and then eventually it "boils over" and I wake up with nearly unbearable pain. I couldn't believe I'd "allowed" this to happen again.
Last year when I suffered this neck pain and ended up in the hospital, I didn't go to the gym for a month or two at the advice of my physical therapist. This was to allow my neck to heal because we thought that the pain was caused by a subluxed vertebra. This has never been confirmed nor denied, but after talking to my chiropractor, I'm beginning to wonder if it is a subluxed vertebra or just a shit-ton of tension.
So this time I asked my chiropractor, "Can I go to the gym and/or exercise? or do I need to take it easy for a few weeks to heal?" and his response: "Listen to your body. If you want to exercise, then exercise. If you start to feel pain, soreness, tension, then stop and take it easy."
What a novel idea! I am amazed that we, as a culture, tend to not listen to our bodies. It seems so obvious. It should be common sense. But, no. We push ourselves, overwork ourselves, over-eat, under-eat... and the list goes on. So now I'm listening to my body. I'm working on listening to myself so that I can be effective at work and in life!
Peace & love.
J
Last year when I suffered this neck pain and ended up in the hospital, I didn't go to the gym for a month or two at the advice of my physical therapist. This was to allow my neck to heal because we thought that the pain was caused by a subluxed vertebra. This has never been confirmed nor denied, but after talking to my chiropractor, I'm beginning to wonder if it is a subluxed vertebra or just a shit-ton of tension.
So this time I asked my chiropractor, "Can I go to the gym and/or exercise? or do I need to take it easy for a few weeks to heal?" and his response: "Listen to your body. If you want to exercise, then exercise. If you start to feel pain, soreness, tension, then stop and take it easy."
What a novel idea! I am amazed that we, as a culture, tend to not listen to our bodies. It seems so obvious. It should be common sense. But, no. We push ourselves, overwork ourselves, over-eat, under-eat... and the list goes on. So now I'm listening to my body. I'm working on listening to myself so that I can be effective at work and in life!
Peace & love.
J
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