I'm a pimp (edited)

Hi friends,

I'm pimping out my friend Mike here. He has no readers except me, his girlfriend, and some mean chick who says he's boring and his blog sucks. Mike and I go way back. We've been work BFFs since before I transferred to the San Jose office because we used to kick it in Kansas City together at national trainings. Then when I transferred to San Jose, he became my work spouse. And then sadly, we were laid off together (on the same day, not in the same meeting). Seriously folks, I love this guy. Give him a chance, pretty please. (Now the pressure is on Mike...)

Edited:
Disclaimer: Some of my more mature readers (if I have any readers left besides Kori and April...) may not find him as entertaining as I do. But folks like Becky, I would imagine, might enjoy him. (Not that you're not mature, Becky. I just know you have a similar sense of humor.)

Apparently I'm not a good judge of mature/older tastes. I was basing that disclaimer off of one of Mike's previous posts, which, if you're reading this in the future, he may have removed due to it's tastelessness. :) Love you, Mike!

Anyway... it's hard out here for a pimp, so I'll just leave you with that.

Peace & love.
J

Rant & Rave Wednesday

I found this post idea over at A Little Blog About Nothing.

Rant: Last night in the parking lot of the grocery store, I experienced a little fender bender. I looked behind me, but the guy was in my blind spot - right behind my head/headrest. Neither of us were at fault. The witnesses said that we backed up in unison. My poor little Civic has a plastic bumper, so that needs to be replaced. The other guy drove a 1989 Ford pickup, so he had no damage, and could have cared less. He said, "I'm cool if you're cool." I said, "HAHA! NO! Do you have insurance?" (as I thought perhaps he'd said it because he was uninsured.) He did indeed have insurance, so we swapped info. After re-assessing the situation, I've decided to bypass reporting it to my insurance (because it's ridiculously effing expensive as it is, which is a long sob story that I'll save for another post if I can detail it all without breaking into a fit of rage or depression). A friend of a friend manages a body shop and is totally going to hook a sister up with a great "green" deal. I'll actually save money because I'm paying less than my insurance deductible. woo! But of course, I wish it had never happened!! Damn Honda for plastic bumpers and blind spots that you apparently can fit a truck in!

Rave: I started back Weight Watchers a few weeks ago, and after 2 weeks I'd lost 4.8 pounds! I weigh in again tonight. You wouldn't know it by looking at me, but according to the ridiculous Body Mass Index, I need to lose at least 70 pounds to be just below the maximum healthy weight for my height. A friend so eloquently stated that if I lose 70 pounds, I'll look like a Brazilian super model.

Rant: I found these super cute trouser jeans at Lane Bryant, and when I went to purchase them, the cashier said that they're being discontinued. She also said that they are the best jeans the store carries, and she, along with other customers, are upset about their decision to discontinue them. I sent an email to Lane Bryant via their website expressing my disappointment, but of course I haven't heard a response from them. How in the world am I supposed to take Stacy & Clinton's advice if I can't find trouser jeans that fit me?! But Julie, you say, I thought you were losing weight? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Since I wear the smallest size at Lane Bryant as it is, as soon as I lose my 70 pounds, I won't be able to shop there anymore anyway. But I got a big ol' booty, so I anticipate I'll still need to search high and low for pants that fit me properly. Damn society and their low rise trend.

Rave: This weekend while blog surfing, I found a little gem called 20 Something Bloggers. I joined the network, and have found a ton of new, totally awesome, hilarious, thought-provoking, creative blogs to read. I have also gained a bunch of new followers! (Hi new friends! and thanks for reading. I hope I don't bore you!) I'm excited about all the new blogs I've found, but at the same time overwhelmed with the volume of reading I'll have if I choose to keep up with everyone!

Peace and love.
J

Question on posting photos

Do any of you have advice for posting photos with Blogger?

The only thing I've found so far is uploading my photos to Photobucket.com and then using the generated HTML code to post photos here. I tried Flickr, but the photos were too large and I could only include one photo per blog post.

Please share how you post photos on your blog.

Thanks!

Peace and love.
J

Happy Wednesday

I'm excited because I have a Friday Fragments post planned for this Friday - complete with a handful of pictures!

Until then, I can't think of anything to say other than I saw The Hangover last weekend and it was beyond hilarious. I laughed through the entire movie. The creators are genius. Seriously, watch it and you'll be thinking, "Who in the world comes up with this stuff?!"

Oh, and if you don't follow dooce, stop by her page because baby Marlo was born early Sunday morning and she is super-duper adorable!

I hope you'll stop by on Friday!

Peace and love.
J

Oh hi

Yeah, I know, I've been away for quite a while. Life is hectic and stressful right now. Found out I failed that damn test again. I got a 72 and all I need is a 75 to pass. Well, I'll pass next time. 4th time's a charm, right? I'll elaborate more in, like, May when I have time, but I have to take 2 exams in April. It's also busy season for accountants right now, and I'm required to work 50 billable hours per week. Not just 50 hours, but 50 billable hours. So if I do stuff that's not billable, those hours are on top of the 50 hours. Awesome, right? And of course that leaves plenty of time to study for 2 exams... I'm losing my mind. I really am.

But I'm not the only one who's a little ticked right now... Let's join Bobby in boycotting Orbitz.com, shall we? Yay for banding together against a-holes and companies that "provide" bad customer "service"!

I hope you all are well.

Peace and love.

Julie

Meme (I so hate that word)

I think the word meme is annoying. I don't know why. I just think it's ugly.

I'm taking this meme from Kori. 7 random/weird things about myself:

1. I can't chew minty gum. It makes me nauseated. I also can't chew gum for more than about 3 minutes. I just have to spit it out.

2. I hate sandwiches. No idea why. I just do. The only sandwiches I'll eat are turkey or pastrami from Togo's. At Subway I'll only get the pastrami. Togo's is my favorite. I don't like Subway, but I do like that they have olives. Togo's doesn't.

3. Apparently it's really weird that I haven't seen any of the Lord of the Rings movies. I just don't care to. I prefer action movies and comedies over sci-fi.

4. My joints are "shallow and loose" according to an orthopedic surgeon. My knee-caps have dislocated since I was in third grade. In 10th grade I dislocated my shoulder after falling on the ski slopes. Now it's loose and has dislocated when I rolled.over.in.bed!! LAME! My knees have been pretty stable for a couple years, so I hope they stay that way! Dislocation is seriously the most traumatic thing I've ever been through. It is PAINFUL. I was very close to going into shock when my shoulder popped out in bed. I was nauseated and almost blacked out.

5. I am a total freak about spelling and grammar. I could NEVER date or marry a man who is a bad speller. Shallow, I know. I also correct people's grammar when they're speaking, and apparently people don't exactly appreciate that.

6. I am hyper-aware of my surroundings. I always notice if someone drops something or if they leave something behind, and I'm the nice kind of person who will let you know. But at the same time, my hyper-awareness is annoying to people. Just the other day my friend (a guy) hocked a loogey in my presence and I said, "Wow. That was sexy." and he said, "Gah, why do you have to notice EVERY single little thing?!" (But in my opinion hocking a loogey is way more annoying that me saying, "that was sexy." LOL)

7. I LOVE office supplies and well organized spreadsheets. Yes, I'm a nerd. I love accounting and auditing. I'm so lucky to have discovered it at a young age and to have had the opportunity and the brains to get into a good school that helped launch me into the workforce. :)

Peace and love.
J

Hilarious websites!

Thanks to the 2008 Weblog Award nominations I have found two awesomely hilarious websites:
mymomisafob.com
mydadisafob.com

For those of you who don't know, FOB stands for "fresh off the boat". Growing in up in very multicultural San Jose, I've been familiar with this term for quite a while. Some people feel that the term is derogatory, but my friends (as well as the website creators) use it tongue-in-cheek.

I've been reading through the sites all afternoon, and this is my favorite so far.

Enjoy!

My secret life on the Internet

(I’m a complete moron because I’m putting off studying for the CPA exam, which I’m taking in LESS THAN 36 HOURS!, to update my blog. If I fail this exam, I blame the Internet.)

I feel like I’ve climbed the next rung in the popularity ladder. Since being commenter number 4 on dooce.com’s post yesterday, my readership had more than doubled! Yes, I went from 2 known readers, to FIVE! (Hi new readers, Jen, Sassy and Julie!) That is, if I still have my 2 previous readers. (Hi Salome and The Pope!) I wouldn’t blame them if they stopped coming by my blog since I don’t post very frequently. (I suck.)

Anyway… on to the details of my secret life… I have probably only told three or four of my real life friends that I write a blog, and I bet money they all forgot because none of them ever make comments on or about my blog. It feels like this blog is my little secret, and I have all these secret Internet friends that no one else knows about.

I think blogs are AWESOME! because they allow us to make acquaintance with people all over the world. It’s super cool how many people have blogs, and how we all support and related to each other. And that leads me to wonder, if everyone I’ve “met” here in the blogosphere are so awesome and kind, who the hell are these people out on the roads who honk, swear, and make obscene hand gestures? Ya know what I’m saying? Maybe not, because I live in LA, and some of you probably don’t. But geez, it seems like getting into a car just transforms anyone into an angry asshole. Enough with that tangent… I love connecting with people all over the country and the world via the blogosphere, but a lot of my friends and co-workers thinks it’s weird that I write a blog and that I love to read so many other people’s blogs. They’re like, if you don’t actually know that person, why would you want to read their blog?

Funny story – I turned my friend/co-worker June on to Dooce.com because I had saved a picture of Chuck (the dog) balancing Dr. Seuss books on his head as my desktop background on my work computer. She approached me the other day and said, “I’ve been reading your friend Heather’s blog everyday for a few months now. She’s funny!” I laughed and said, “Heather? I don’t know anyone named Heather.” She replied, “Dooce.com!” And I laughed, “Oh, she’s not my actual friend, I just found her blog on the Internet on day.”

I wish I could quit my job and just read blogs all day. There are seriously so many witty, creative, well-written, artistic people in this world. It is awesome, and I LOVE the Internet for bringing this to light and facilitating the sharing of our talents. So inspiring.

Now if only my friends and family would get with the program, and stop calling me a computer nerd! :-/

peace & love.
J

In retrospect, that wasn’t a very exciting, well-written, or cohesive post, but give me a break, I’m brain dead from studying for this exam!

Depressed

Last night I found the blog of Matt Logelin (www.mattlogelin.com) who lives in LA. His gorgeous wife, Liz, passed away in March, just 27 hours after giving birth to their little girl, Madeline, who was 7 weeks pre-mature and weighed 3 lbs 14 oz. He writes each night about what he and his daughter did that day. It's so sweet and beautiful, but at the same time horribly, horribly sad and painful. His posts made me cry multiple times last night and today. I couldn't access the site at work, so I read it after work. I've read all his entries up to today. And after I finished reading, I almost felt sick like throwing up. I was so sad and I feel like I know his wife now and I'm so so so terribly sad for him. There's that saying - "Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." I don't know if that's true. I've never loved (romantically, that is), and I feel like I'd rather keep it that way than fall in love and lose him. It's so oppressively devastating!

So I was at home, sad, but I had told my cousin Marcy I'd come over to her place tonight as she was having a "going away" BBQ of sorts. On Sunday she's leaving for Africa for the summer. I really did not feel like going. I took a nap for probably an hour and then headed over an hour after it started... fashionably late. Being there didn't cheer me up at all. I didn't know anyone else. Then a bunch of girls went into Marcy's room to do a Buddhist chant while a lady, who appeared to be a leader, rolled up the scroll they were chanting to (?). I was very uncomfortable because I'm Christian, I didn't know what they were saying, and I was sad that Marcy seemed to have fallen away from God and chosen to pursue Buddhism. It became overwhelming as they got louder and faster, and then once the scroll was rolled up, put into a box, and then placed in a cabinet the chanting slowed down before ceasing.

Marcy's Mom was there and she told me that Marcy recommended she try attending Buddhist meetings and get into chanting because she'd been having some relationship difficulties. She told me that she did try it, and everything is so much better for her now. I just kept nodding and listening. She said, "I thought at first this would be yet another of Marcy's crazy adventures... Like when she went to Ghana and became a born again Christian. Thankfully she got over that and is into this now. This is much healthier." I was so taken aback by that statement. Had she no idea of my faith and that it was such an integral part of my being, and has been for 26 years?! Her words brought me to my breaking point, and I started to cry. I told Marcy that I had to leave.

I hope that tomorrow is a better day.

Peace and love.
J

Things my Dad taught me

I got this idea from Stephanie Klein's blog.

Things I learned from my father:
1. I don’t need to learn to change my own oil because I’ll make enough money to pay someone else to do it.
2. Even he got Cs in school.
3. Boys have no social graces.
4. The monsters come out at night.
5. It’s ok to cry.
6. Not to call names.
7. How to drive a tractor.
8. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t like to do.
9. How to drive a manual transmission.
10. To make sure the horizon line is completely horizontal when taking a photograph.
11. Capillary action.
12. To enjoy smooth jazz.
13. To shred credit card applications before trashing them.
14. To read a map.
15. To use a computer.
16. That I can’t live without an Apple computer.
17. Reasons the refrigerator might not be working.
18. Economics (even though I still don’t really get it).
19. What it means to be a Democrat or a Republican.
20. x times x equals x squared.
21. What quality stereo sounds like.
22. To use a level, a voltmeter, and an electric drill, among other things.
23. How to pick up dog poop.
24. How to balance a checkbook.
25. To pump gas.
26. To pack by rolling things.
27. To love hockey.
28. How to ride a bike.
29. To get up and walk around when on a long flight.
30. How to fish.
31. How to get something out of the sink drain pipe.
32. To appreciate the fantastic-ness of Home Depot.
33. How to paint a wall.
34. How to pitch a tent, light a lantern, and light a stove.
35. How to pack to go camping.
36. To dig a trench around the tent if it’s going to rain.
37. Cats are awesome.
38. That I can do anything I put my mind to.
39. That education is important.
40. Not to “burn bridges” because you never know who you may have to work for in the future.
41. “There is a certain amount of money that causes all loyalty to go out the window.”
42. Don’t walk through oil spots in parking spaces
43. Avoid pot holes.
44. Unconditional love.

Becoming a Possibilitarian

Didn't have much to do at work today, so I busied myself looking at beautiful things on etsy and exploring artists' websites. One of my favorite mixed media artists on etsy is Kelly Rae Roberts. She is so creative and talented. Her work is gorgeous.



From Kelly Rae Roberts’ website:
i first heard the word ‘possibilitarian’ in a quote by dr. norman peale: “become a possibilitarian. no matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities – always see them, for they’re always there.” i’ve been hooked on its meaning ever since. do you see the bright light of your life’s horizon (even on the average days)? do you feel its warmth (even when you’re struggling)? have you begun to tough the surface of all that is possible for your life? does it give you goosebumps to think about it (i hope it does)? if so, then you’re a possibilitarian too. it’s the best feeling in the world, this thinking of what is possible. it’s energy. it’s passion. it’s dreaming big, and taking small steps. it’s the oomph of our everyday lives.

I know that I was meant for more than being just an accountant. Yesterday at work I was surfing etsy as I’m wont to do and I came upon a shop of a lady who had committed to donating some of her profits to Doctors Without Borders in the wake of the horrific results of the cyclone in Myanmar. I’d heard of Doctors Without Borders before, but I had never looked into it until this week. Not only are they looking for volunteers in the medical field, they are looking for people with office-type skills to manage their operations. One of the opportunities that jumped out at me is the Financial Controllership job. I could totally do this! Now since it’s a volunteer position, I certainly cannot afford, at this point in my life, to take a year off of being paid to do this. But, I have a meaningful goal to look forward to.

If you are interested in learning about Doctors Without Borders or in making a donation, please visit their website at www.doctorswithoutborders.org.

Peace & love.
J

FOUR

4 Jobs I’ve Had:
Team Lead at Jamba Juice, Shift Supervisor at Starbucks, Research Manager at a recruiting firm, Senior Auditor at an accounting firm

4 Movies I’ve Watched Over and Over:
Wild Hearts Can't be Broken, Shrek, Sixteen Candles, Old School

4 Places I Have Lived:
San Jose, Irvine, San Luis Obispo, Los Angeles

4 Shows I Watch:
Grey's Anatomy, ER, The Office, October Road

4 Places I’ve Been:
Suriname, Australia, New Zealand, Seoul, Korea

4 People Who Email Me Regularly:
Dad, Papa, Amanda, Breanna

4 Favorite Things to Eat:
Filet Mignon, Mashed potatoes, Adam's Peanut Butter Fudge Cup Ripple cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory, Cereal

4 Places I’d Rather Be:
with family, with friends, Hawaii, Australia

4 Things I Look Forward to this Year:
Meeting an amazing man (I totally feel like I will!), seeing the new babies of all my friends who are pregnant right now, passing my last 2 CPA exams, losing weight